a black backgrd...

to reflect my totally dark awful life now.

stressed is de word.

probably this is de reason why i've been exercising and eating slightly lesser than before YET my weight has been increasing. i'm currently standing on 55kg. holy shiat. O.O

almost broke down & cry at work today. tears flowed to de eyes numerous times, i lost count. but swallowed them down cos i know i cant. i cant. i cant. wrong place wrong timing.

i think i'm giving myself too much unneccessary pressure, be it w studies, work, friends. horrible. i cant help it.. i cant seem to relax myself anymore. when did i become so rigid? i lost de ability to think positively.. and i found myself on de other extreme end w de devil.. everything i see = bad bad bad. i'm like a bucket of water filled to de brim. shake me lightly and water will spill.

i want to stop working stop studying stop doing everything!!!

i'm squeezed dry.